Out of the Question
by Dwell on Your Dreams
Summary: When you can't find a babysitter, you'll just have to take the child with you, right? Well that's a no if your name is Lucius Malfoy. Remember, every relationship has its ups and downs.
1. Chapter One

**Out of the Question**

 **May 1984**

"It's out of the question that I will bring a three year old with us tonight, Narcissa!"

"What do you suggest we do then? My parents are in France. Your father's ill. Our nearest friends will also attend this event. There is no one to babysit him!"

Lucius glared at his wife as he tighten up his tie and smoothed out his black velvet dress robe. He had no good answer but in this case she would not get her will through. To let their three year old son accompany them to the Ministry's yearly charity event to mingle with the pure blood social elite? Never.

Narcissa pulled the brush through her brown and blonde hair and sighed at the lack of response. "Lucius, we don't have much of a choice! There is _no one_ who's available to babysit him, and there is no way on earth I would leave my only child in the hands of the house elves. I can trust them with the food and dishes, not with my only child."

Lucius still didn't say anything.

"I take your lack of response as an agreement."

"Bloody Merlin, witch, I'm thinking!" he burst out.

She shrugged and turned to face the mirror again. They had been arguing about this almost the whole day. The idea was that Lucius' father, Abraxas, would after great length look after Draco, but he had announced himself ill only a few hours ago. Narcissa reached for some hairpins and started fixing her coiffure. "The only other option we have is that I'll stay home with him."

"Wha- You can't stay home. How would it look if I showed up at this event alone tonight?"

"We don't have much of a choice, Lucius. I stay home or we'll bring him with us."

"For the last time! He's not comming with us! I can't show up with a child, how would that look?"

Narcissa remained silent for a few moments, still looking at her own reflection in the mirror, pondering if she would say the words she had on mind. "It's always about you, isn't it?"

Her words struck him. He opened his mouth to say something but shut it again. He turned to face her completely "About me!?" he eventually burst out. "You think I'll go to this charity event for my own sake?"

"Yes, yes that is exactly what I think!" she spun around in her chair "You are at least not doing it for the charity."

"What the bloody hell is your point of this conversation, Cissa?"

"Don't you 'Cissa' me. Not now, when I'm crossed with you."

"If this all are about why I'm not taking Draco with us, you're just being silly. There is no way we're bringing him!"

"And why not that? Are you too inflated by yourself to see that he's a perfectly well behaved little boy. What are you afraid of? That he will embarrass you in front of your so called co-workers? Your not even an employee at the Ministry, Lucius! You're just running back and forth-"

He shot back, "At least I'm not just sitting home in some wingback reading old books whole day!"

Narcissa's eyes darkened. She put down the hair brush on the dressing table and put on a forged smile. "By second thoughts, it would be lovely to go out tonight, it was after all a long time ago since I've had a pleasant evening. And who knows, perhaps I could get in some well mannered conversation for once." She rose and checked her hair one last time in the mirror. "I'll just get Draco ready."

"He is _not_ , coming, with us." Lucius clarified, his voice was strained and his fists clenched.

"Oh, don't you worry, _darling_. Your not so capable wife will take care of him all evening, just as usual,"

"I haven't said that you're incapable of anything, Narcissa."

She continued as if she hadn't heard him "it is after all always me who gets up in the middle of the night if he cries, it's I who plays with him, reads stories for him and oh, there was something else, oh right! I gave birth to him as well."

"Are you trying to say that I'm not capable to take care of my own son?" he snarled and clenched his fists again.

She walked slowly towards him and crossed her arms "I haven't said that you're incapable of anything, Lucius." she said haughtily.

He reached forward and grabbed her wrist to pull her closely to him. "Then please do tell me what is it you want me to understand?"

She whimpered at his sudden lunge. Her attempt to seem unaffected and callous began slowly to languish as she tried to withdraw her hand from his firm grip "I don't want- Lucius- let go of me."

"Answer me!" He shook her and tighten his grip.

"Don't you dare take that tone towards me!" She stared him in the eye "Your not a bad father! Is that what you want to hear?! That there is no other man I ever would want to have a child with, accept you, Lucius! Just- please- let go of my wrist!"

He released her as if she had burned him. Narcissa took a few steps away from him, she rubbed her wrist with her other hand and her eyes were glossy. "We only have one child, and we won't have any more. I'm asking you to take care of these few years as we have as parents of a young child, or you'll regret it later, believe me."

Lucius stood like paralysed, he didn't know what to say. Narcissa turned and walked back to the dressing table and started to fiddle with some necklaces. She then sighed and left the bedroom.

* * *

 **Ohoh, cliffhanger. I just want to state a few things: Firstly, in my stories Narcissa have the hair colour that she had in the movies because I think it suits her better, like it or not. Secondly, in this event that they're eventually going to, the Minister of Magic is Cornelius Fudge, THOUGH he didn't became Minister until 1990, in order to make it fit with my storyline we'll just have to get along with that. Thirdly, I don't own Harry Potter and all rights belongs to J.K Rowling.**

 **Thank you for reading this far. Next chapter will be up soon.**


	2. Chapter Two

"Ah, how lovley to the the Malfoy couple, always as stunn-," The hostess, Mrs Fudge, stood by the entrance and greeted everyone welcome as they walked in. She quickly saw the blond little boy standing behind his mother, holding her hand. "but who is this? The young mister Malfoy I suppose?" She looked up at Narcissa with a big smile on her face.

"We're terrible sorry, Mrs Fudge. We haven't been able to find someone who could babysit him. I ensure you that he will make no fuss."

"Oh, I have no doubt, Mrs. Malfoy. It's absolutely fine," she smiled down at Draco "the sooner introduction to the ministry the better, I suppose?" She chuckled lovingly and gestured toward the great ballroom.

The ballroom was decorated in gold and white. In all of the four corners of the room stood a silver birch with golden leaves, do to the theme of this year's charity event: 'Our Magnificent Nearby Wildlife'. A vague theme according to many, and exactly what the money that was collected during this event would go to, was still not quite clear.

Lucius walked past Narcissa and took the lead into the ballroom. They had barely spoken to each other since they were done arguing. Lucius had a deeper frown than usual, looking clearly disapproving. Narcissa cast a glance at her husband. "Could you _please_ wipe that surly expression of your face." she said irritably, she hadn't really forgive him for his statements earlier. He clenched his jaw and held his head high as they walked towards the crowd of people who mingled in the middle of the room. Draco one the other hand, looked more and more nervous as closer they got and tighten the grip around his mothers hand. Narcissa looked down at him at his sudden touch. She smiled a comfortingly warm smile when he met her eyes and she felt his hand relax a bit. As they got closer to the crowd, Narcissa noticed a few unfamiliar faces turn towards them.

Walden Macnair stepped forward and greeted Lucius with a firm handshake. "Malfoy, long time no see. How are you these days?"

"Superb, Macnair. How are you?"

"Never better. A bit more work on the department now, just before holiday, that's all." He sipped his drink and saw Narcissa. "Who's this beautiful woman you've brought? She's way too stunning to be your wife, eh, Malfoy?" Macnair reached for Narcissa's hand to kiss. She reluctantly gave it to him, she was not flattered by this half drunk man her husband apparently knew's way to greet her. Draco had crept behind his mother to hide behind her skirt.

Lucius' pursed his lips. "Yes, this is my wife, Narcissa."

"Ha, now I remember, the youngest Black daughter. But I could have guessed, Lucius, only the best's enough, is it not?" He winked at Lucius and took a large sip of the drink he held in hand. "You're a lucky man!"

"He certainly is." Narcissa cold voice spoke up before she could keep herself back. She glanced at her husband and back at Macnair.

Lucius reacted as if he hadn't heard her. "If you excuse me, I feel like getting some refreshments." Without another word if perhaps Narcissa would like something to drink he went out of sight in to the crowded place. Narcissa watched him leave with a bitter look. She then picked up Draco and went straight in the other direction without another look at Macnair.

* * *

"The great, Lucius Malfoy." Augustus Rookwood suddenly stood beside Lucius. He turned to the bartender and ordered a Firewhiskey with ice and then turned to Lucius again. "Long time no see, I must say."

"Rookwood. It's been too long. How are you?" Lucius received his ordered drink first and sipped it.

"Can't complain. See you brought the whole family?" He nodded towards the sofa set were Narcissa sat with Draco in her lap.

Lucius didn't answer and began to walk away from the bar. Rookwood followed and smirked "What's the matter with you? Trouble in paradise?"

"Leave it." Lucius responded shortly.

"Pardon me." Rookwood chuckled and raised his hands in surrender. "How old's your boy now?"

"He turns four, this June."

"And I see that's he's a mummy's boy?"

"Indeed he is" Lucius sipped his drink.

"But you only have this one, right?"

Lucius nodded and sipped the drink once more.

"He looks a lot like you, he certainly has inherited the Malfoy features."

"What is this, Rookwood? Twenty questions?" Lucius chuckled nervously "Are you becoming more sentimental on old days?"

"Of course not. I was just curious, that's all." he sipped his drink "Let an _old_ man be curious, as you so gently put it."

* * *

"I was paying Twillfitt and Tattings a visit the other day and they have recently got in a new kind of fabric. The most stunning piece of work I've seen in quite some time. The-"

"Draco, you must sit still, darling." Draco, who had grown tired of the women talking about something as dull as the newest kind fabric, had started wriggling in his mothers lap. He cought the eye of the carpet fringes on the floor. If he just could stretch a little bit more to grab... "You want to get down to the floor, sweetheart?" Narcissa picked up Draco and placed him on the carpet by her feet. "Forgive me Cynthia, you were saying? The fabric?"

Mrs. Mockridge continued "Yes, the fabric. The texture was kind of shimmering, almost like..."

The woman's voices drifted away. The fringes wasn't as fun as Draco had thought. At the lack of entertainment he started to look into the crowd of mingling guests. They were all wearing long dresses or suites, some of the ladies wore funny hats. But there! Across the room and among the others stood his father! Ooh he wanted to go and say hello to him. It wasn't far and his mother wouldn't notice if he disappeared for a little while, he would be back before she would notice at all. Draco glanced upwards at his mother, she was to occupied by the conversation of fabric with Mrs. Mockridge so she would definitely not see him sneaking away to his father. He began to crawl into the crowded place with a steady eye on his father, then he stopped and glanced over at his mother again. Just to make sure she hadn't noticed him slipping away, and much to Draco's delight she hadn't. Draco now got to his feet and was about to make a steady walk towards his father when he suddenly was out of sight. Draco spun around once and noticed that he was surrounded by tall men in long robes and women in strange hats. Panic started to fill the little boy.

"We'll look here." A man with a goatee had noticed Draco down on the floor. "You're a bit lost, aren't you?"

Draco stared terrified up at the man and fell backwards onto an other large man's feet.

"Whoa, watch it boy!" the other man roared.

Draco whimpered and looked around in despair to locate his father again. A thin man with a long green robe moved out of the way and made Lucius visible to Draco again. Draco staggered to his feet and rushed towards his father. As he got there he threw his tiny arms around Lucius' leg and hugged tight.

* * *

"...every year and-" Lucius stopped and looked down at what he had felt grabbed his thigh. "Draco!"

The little boy pressed his entire body harder against his father's leg. As if he was afraid that if he let got he would disappear from him.

"Draco? Where's your mother?" Lucius asked irritably and reached down to wrench his son's arms from his leg. "Boy, what's the matter?"

Draco looked up at him with watery eyes. " _Daddy_ " he squeaked and reached up his arms to mark that he wanted to be picked up.

Rookwood looked highly amused as Lucius picked up Draco in his arms.

"You wouldn't think this eight years ago, would you? Carrying around a miniature of yourself?" Rookwood nodded towards Draco. "Don't you miss the old times, Malfoy? I bet he's out there, somewhere. Why don't the two of us seek to him-"

Lucius shifted Draco in his arms, away from Rookwood and whispered: "I think you should stop talking and drink no more, think about where you are, idiot."

* * *

"...and then there was this thin-" Narcissa looked down by accident. "Where's Draco?" she interrupted herself. She looked at the floor around her and then looked up at Cynthia Mockridge.

"He was there just a minute ago." Mrs. Mockridge said bluntly over her wineglass.

"I know! I put him there! But he's not here anymore!" Narcissa got to her feet and looked into the crowd of people. "He would not wander away alone." Narcissa went into the crowded place and began searching for her son. All the so very important guests watched her with wonder. She saw the drunken man who they'd met before, he stood unpleasantly close to two women who giggled at his probably highly inappropriate remarks. However, she didn't have to search for long, across the room she saw her husband and Draco in his arms. Relieved she hurried to them. "Draco!" she said sternly to her son. "What were you thinking? To wander away from me on your own, I thought you would know better!"

Draco looked at her ashamed and then buried his head in the crook of his father's neck.

Narcissa reached for him "And you ought not to disturb your father, Draco." As she was about to pull him away from Lucius, Draco let out a deafening wile.

"Draco!" said Lucius and Narcissa in unison.

" _Noo!_ I want to be with Father!" Draco started to wriggle in Narcissa's grasp. "Mummy, NO!" cried Draco and he reached back to Lucius.

"Stop this nonsense, Draco" said Narcissa and tried as best as she could to hold her squirming three year old in her arms. "You're tired, I know" she cooed to him with her motherly voice. Draco's cries now turned into crying. The once mingling guests was now turning in the Malfoy's direction and some looked clearly disapproving, while some, perhaps parents themselves, smiled understandingly.

Draco started to kick with force and Narcissa struggled to retain her firm hold of him. " _Noo!_ " cried Draco between his wails.

"That's enough" Lucius stepped in and grabbed Draco firmly and almost shoved him over his shoulder. "Mrs. Malfoy, we're leaving, _now_."

* * *

 **I hate to ask, but I'm afraid I have to: Please review! I really like writing this story and it makes my work twice as delightful if I would know what you think. Good or bad. All notes are welcome.**

 **Thank you for reading! Next chapter will be up in short time.**


	3. Chapter Three

Once the family were home inside the manor again, Lucius tossed his coat at side, onto the waiting house elf and went with firm steps across the entrance hall. At the first steps of the staircase he turned around. "I told you that we shouldn't bring him!" he spat at Narcissa furiously. "I said no! Yet _you_ did!"

"Lower your voice!" She walked passed Lucius and began climbing the stairs while carrying a sleeping Draco.

"Don't you dare walk away from me when I'm talking to you!" he screamed after her.

She turned back to him at the corner of the stairs "I _dare_ whatever I want! And I'm going to put our son to bed first." she hissed at him. "Save you energy!"

Lucius rushed up the stairs after her but while upstairs he turned left towards the master bedroom instead of right, towards Draco's bedchamber. He opened the door violently and slammed it shut behind him. He lit the fireplace with a simple spell and went directly to the liquor cabinet to pour himself the third large firewhiskey of the evening. He took the drink with him as he went to the leather settee in front of the fireplace. Once seated he made a heavy sigh and placed his head in his hands.

After what felt like ages, the door suddenly, again, opened violently. "You blame me?!" Narcissa's clear voice was cold and hurt. "You dare to blame me for what happened tonight?"

Lucius removed his head from his hands when he heard his wife's voice. "Well, who else am I supposed to be blaming then?" he said haughty and rose from the settee.

"You're unbelievable." she crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes "You are absolutely unbelievable."

Lucius started to lose his temper even further. "Dear wife, _you_ where the one who thought it was a good idea to bring him! And _you_ where the one who lost him while at the Ministry!" His nostrils flattered and he pointed his finger at her.

She copied his movements and pointed her finger at him. "But it was _you_ who didn't let me stay home with him, _husband_! What else were we supposed to do then? I do not recall that you had a better idea!"

"Don't start with that again!" he roared and turned away from her to face his own reflection in the huge window. "You're unreasonable, woman!"

A few silent moments past. The tension between the two and in the room were thick enough to cut through with a knife. "You know what? Fine, blame me. Blame me for all what I care." Narcissa lowered her hand but did not turn away her eyes. "If it makes your self inflated mind at ease." she added with in muttering.

Lucius heard her. He turned towards her again and his eyes darkened. "You'll do wise to stop calling me selfish." He slowly stepped towards her. "I'll have to donate _loads_ of money to this silly event if someone hopefully ever will forget about what happened tonight!"

"Ha, if that was supposed to make you sound less selfish: you didn't do very well."

"ENOUGH!" Lucius roared. He'd lost it and speed up his pace towards her.

He was close now, too close. Narcissa started to back away from him but he followed her until her back hit the wall. She had nowhere to go, and for the first time in her life, was she scared of the man who stood before her. " _Don't you dare touch me_ " she suddenly whimpered in barely a whisper, far more submissively then intended.

At her words he grabbed her waist and pushed her up against the wall with a force he'd never used on her before. "I _dare_ whatever I want." he hissed in her ear. He took a deep breath to calm himself down a bit and with that inhale her scent, _oh_ the sweet scent. He was this close to pull out his wand and curse her, however his mind suddenly had other ideas. He firmly grabbed her left breast and gave it a light squeeze, while he started sucking on her neck.

" _Get off me!-_ "

He left her neck, crushed his lips on hers and silenced her to a muffled 'mmmph'. Lucius reached down to unbuckle his belt and squeezed her breast once more. He looked up to meet her eyes. What he saw was nothing but eyes of terror. At once he released her and immediately stepped away. What had he become? This wasn't the the way it was supposed to be. It was like a whim made him desperate to show her that he was at charge, that he was the man...- _What had he done?_ "Cissa..."

" _Get... away... from me._ " Her voice shook and she looked everywhere but at him.

The embarrassment and shame flooded over him. He'd never crossed the line before, nevertheless so vulgarly, and what did he think? That she would throw herself on him by his not so gentle touch and after a whole night's quarrel. He'd steady enough to talk calmly and unhooked his dressing gown from the coat-hanger "I'll sleep in the upper west wing, good night." and left the master bedroom without another word.

* * *

They say: don't go to bed at loggerheads*, and that's probably very true. One would never forgive oneself if the last conversation you had with your loved one was an argument. Or nonetheless if your last interaction most likely will be seen as an violation.

At the breakfast table next morning Draco was in a unusually good mood and ate everything Narcissa offered him. Apart from Draco rambling about anything between heaven and earth, no one spoke. Lucius sat at the end of the table with his nose in The Morning Prophet, he had neither touched his food nor his tea.

"Would you like to accompany me to my mother and father today?"

Lucius looked up at the sound of his wife's voice, but looked down as quickly again when he understood that she wasn't talking to him.

"Would you, sweetheart?" Narcissa cooed on when she didn't got an direct answer. "To visit your grandparents?"

Draco who just had swallowed the last mouthful of his scrambled eggs looked hesitant. "Do I have to?" he tried.

Narcissa looked at Draco meaningly. "Don't you think they would be happy to see you?"-

Lucius laughed internally. He did not now that Cyngus or Druella Black could feel happiness, such thing didn't seem to be a part of their nature.

-"They are after all coming home from France this afternoon, who knows they might have brought you something?"

Draco, who understood that he didn't had much of a choice in the matter, obliged to his mother's wish.

"Then I think it's a suitable time for a bath, don't you think?"

Draco nodded his head, "I'll tell the house elf to tap up the bath immediately," and sprung to his feet. "Thanks for breakfast!" He yelled half way out of the room.

Narcissa smiled after him. "Draco do not run! I'll be with you in a minute." As she was about to rise from her chair, Lucius spoke up for the first time since last night. "Narcissa-" He'd put down the paper and was now looking at her.

She hesitated but continued to rise without a single glance at him.

"Narcissa?" His voice was gentle almost supplicant. "...just, listen to me."

Narcissa stood straight up with her eyes fixedly on the table surface while tracing one of her fingers in a light slot onto the table. "Why, Lucius?" she swallowed "Nothing out of value has seemed to come out of your mouth of lately."

Lucius clenched both his fists and squared his jaw. " _...I'm sorry._ " The words was strained and unfamiliar to Narcissa's ears. Lucius never apologised. "I'm so sorry, Narcissa." he repeated.

Taken aback by his words she looked down at him. He looked down on his lap, still with clenched fists.

" _Please forgive me._ " he whispered, still not looking at her, this was clearly difficult for him.

Narcissa sat back down on her chair next to him again but didn't say anything.

"I crossed a major line last night. I don't know what got into me, I've been trying the whole morning to blame the alcohol but I know that I hadn't been drinking that much. It's vile and I have no excuse, but I can promise you that something like it will never happen again-"

He talked in a nonstop flow and before she knew it she'd put her hand on his to cease him. When she thought of the arguments of yesterday did it seem quite ridiculous. She too, thought he'd gone too far, way too far, but in complete honesty she had provoked him. "I provoked you, Lucius-"

He shook his head. "No- you may have done, but I did the same to you, and it doesn't matter- You even told me to stop-" he took a deep breath "...please forgive me, Narcissa."

His sudden vulnerability felt strange to her. He was like a child trying to beg for forgiveness. Something inside her told her not to forgive him this easy, but by the fact that he, not only once but twice, had told her that he was sorry made her certain as anything that he meant it genuinely. Lucius Malfoy was not one who begged for forgiveness. She looked up and locked eyes with him.

He hesitated but said the words he had on his lips: "I love you so much, Narcissa. And I am so, so sorry."

She nodded her head and bit her lower lip, "And I do love you," she whispered.

He leaned forward and took both her hands in his. "I'm a fool-"

"Yes, yes you are,"

He hinted a smirk, "-let me finish. I'm a fool-"

Narcissa put two of her fingers on his lips, "You don't need to say more. You're a fool, a big bloody fool, Lucius Malfoy." She locked eyes with him again.

A bit awkward moment past when none of them said anything, or proceeded with any motion. Perhaps it would be best if they both withdrew to lick their mental wounds.

"Do you forgive me?" Lucius broke the silence.

Narcissa was about to laugh internationally but decided not to. How could he still doubt? The man who she knew had never doubted before. Because she did believe him when he said that he genuinely was sorry, and she did believe him when he said that it would never happen again. "If you really need to hear me say it I might as well just say it. The question is how you can doubt-"

"It's not a question of doubt, I just need to hear you say it"

She looked up at him again. "I do forgive you, Lucius,"

A solid relief went trough his body.

"Now, show me that you still can kiss like a gentleman."

Lucius was more than happy and eager to proceed. He leaned in, grabbed her face with both his hands and kissed her surprisingly gentle, making sure not to make _any_ mistake this time. Narcissa broke the kiss shortly after but kept the small distance between their faces, and whispered: "I think I'm needed upstairs, before our son floods his bathroom." She was not going to give it to him easy. A quick peek on the lips was what he deserved, not the snog session he might've wanted. She stroked his cheek and rose to help Draco with is bath upstairs.

* * *

 **Finally I got the time to post this chapter. I'm not sure if this will be the last one or not, as always I'm not quite happy with the ending and would like to continue it.**

 **Thank you so much for reading and _please_ don't forget to review! Write anything, positive or negative, everything is welcomed. **

(* I'm not sure if this sentence will make any sense. I've practically just translated straight off from Swedish, were we sometimes say: "gå inte till sängs oense" and the best translation I could come up with was "don't go to bed at loggerheads". Hope this clear out some potentially confusion.)


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